R. Oeterson, Extreme Camper

Lady Ragnar and I haven't been camping in a while so we decided to go down to Big Basin State Park (just north of Santa Cruz). Big mistake. It was hot enough in our normally cold part of town -- around 80 -- but as we went south down the Peninsula it just got hotter and hotter. And of course the air conditioner in the minivan is broken. Even with the windows rolled down going 75 on the freeway, it was boiling hot in the car.

The fun really began when we got to Los Gatos (near S.C.) and traffic was slowed to a standstill. We sat there in the broiling heat. How was it? Let's just say I saw one guy get out of his car on the side of the road to pee, then fall down screaming as nothing but scalding steam shot from his penis. Anyway eventually we got off Hell's highway and onto the slightly cooler, foresty roads leading to the park.

When we got to the campground it was touch and go, but we managed to grab the second-to-last space. Sweet! We got to our site which was 85 degrees in the shade and about 10' from the bathroom. Not a stinky bathroom, but still. Bathroom. Bees and flies descended upon us as we sat at the sticky, warm to the touch picnic table. We rued the fact that we'd only brought two beers. Over in the next campsite, children screeched. Motorbikes roared.

We sat there. The sun started to go down but the heat stayed steady. We were sticky and gross. The Off, it did nothing. We both imagined a sleepless night in the boiling hot tent.

Finally we ate our macaroni n' cheese, pounded our beers, and got the fuck out of there. Yeah that's right. We totally pussed out and went home after paying for a site. I feel so rugged!

Lessons for next time:
1. Beer. We were short on beer supplies by at least 400%. The extra beers would have rendered us insensible to some of the downsides of the site.
2. Camping. In the summer? You idiot.